Seven things not to do when everyone's trying to kill you

Being a wizard is hazardous to your health. Things not to do when being tracked by murderers: #1 Do not drag the girl you're in love with into your deadly mess. #2 Do not accept a bag full of money. #3 If you do accept said bag of money, don't be dumb enough to shove it down the back of your pants. #4 Do not get into a battle with the evil lunch lady. #5 Do not start a war in a tourist hotspot. #6 Do not let your dad find out you're a wizard. #7 Do NOT under any circumstances, no matter how desperate things might seem, let Eric Deldridge convince you to break into the Library and seize control of the magical world.